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| My temporary workspace for the last 2 days. I really like the desk and may change my worktable for a desk with drawers. |
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| Though I remarkably restrained myself, I felt in the spirit of full disclosure that I should tell you I requested a room with 2 double beds so I could have the surface area to spread out. ;) |
Two days in a hotel by myself with some art supplies and "no obligations". Sounds like heaven, right? Well, for me, it was kind of difficult to jump right in due to missing my guys and my pup... even though the whole thing was my idea (and the hotel was about 10 or so minutes from home). I chanted to myself on the way, "this is an act of great self-love", "how else am I going to get in the meditation time I crave so much right now?", "Do not go home". After checking in and setting up, I glued one thing. Then I ate and watched TV. It wasn't even good TV. Then I glued another thing and checked Facebook. Really, I needed some time to decompress before inspiration hit. About 9:00 I finally got the paint out and really got going. About 10:30, I called home and almost cried talking to Angelo. He picked up on it and was sad. :( *Insert best guilt releasing I could muster* More art making. A little "Soul of Healing" meditation with Deepak Chopra before bed and I slept peacefully.
The next morning, I meditated again and did some chakra balancing sun salutations. By then, I was feeling so peaceful, I wasn't bothered by the fact that I had to eat, shower, etc. and wasn't using my art time to maximum efficiency. Yes, I managed to work some guilt in about not doing what I loved enough in there the first day. Started art journal entries in the afternoon and by about midnight, I was still going strong. Then, an abrupt awareness that I needed to pack up if I wanted to do morning yoga before checkout made me sad. Nothing is ever an experience with just one emotion, though, is it? Even though it was only 2 days, and in some ways "not enough time", I was excited to get back to my family and eat in my own house. But, it was so good and I'm so glad I did it. Maybe there's a state park near that rents cabins??
Then, at home, I answered an email where I backed out of something I committed to because "it wasn't an absolute yes" (so it was a no... forget where I heard that, but it's good to remember.) After sending that email, I was greeted by a newsletter from SARK that started by asking me "Do you ever feel guilty or worried about taking time and energy just for you? Most people do. Do you happily and easily change or cancel plans that no longer feel good? Most people don't.
Many people are motivated unknowingly by what i call *FOG or *PUS- or both!
Fear
Obligation
Guilt
Pressure
Urgency
Scarcity
Copyright 2012 SARK. All rights reserved. Even though we are not.;-)"
Copyright 2012 SARK. All rights reserved. Even though we are not.;-)"
That hit home on both accounts!
Then, I found this post by Michelle Ward, the "When I Grow Up Coach" on self-care. Seems there is a Universal theme going on!
Also something I found recently that you may find inspiring and related: How to love yourself in 17 Ways a post by Evelyn Lim.
Wishing you much Self Love and Self Care!!
Posts
Was it your blog that I read about Self Care cards? I got these from Amazon and they are so nice. They were created by Cheryl Richardson.
ReplyDeleteGreat post. Self-care is something I am finally able to do after 40 years of looking after everyone but myself. I have a long way to go but knowing I have a problem is the first step.
No, it wasn't here, but I'm going to check those out! They sound great!
DeleteSo glad you like the post and that you are taking care of yourself. As nurturers, it is so easy to forget that we give the best care to others when we fill up with energy and goodness for ourselves. Go you! :)
LOVE this, baby-girl. It is what I finally gave myself permission to do at least once a year. It took me several attempts before I finally went to the beach with a co-worker (no family) and spent it doing journal work, art, meditation and reading. My co-worker gave me space--which was one of my requirements to go with her. I've done it twice since. I'm working on--still have feelings of guilt--going again this August.
ReplyDeleteThat's wonderful, Mama!! I look forward to hearing all about it!! Yes, that guilt is pretty stubborn, isn't it? I'm sure you also have "separation anxiety" like I do too. We are so used to being with and doing for our family that separating is difficult, though necessary so we can heal ourselves. I'm working on my next outing - Ghoultide Gathering. It's in Chelsea, MI, so lots of drive time, but I've been wanting to go for a few years, so if I can get a driving buddy (have someone interested, but don't know if it works for her schedule), I'm putting it on the calendar! Even though it's my anniversary weekend *guilt*... we'll be back by the actual date, though, so I'm ok with it. :) The beach is a great idea- all the soothing and purifying waves. :)
Delete::laughing:: I know I sound so silly!!! My children are all grown up, but still I think--I need to be where they can find me if they need me. Btw, you are included among the "children"!!! You are so right though--it is OUR guilt (aka fear) that keeps us from doing what our Soul's need. I'm so proud of you for discovering this at such a young age! It took Bonnie's death (when I was 47) for me to understand what my Soul needed.
DeleteNo, it doesn't sound silly. I've heard over and over that even if they are grown, parents still worry about their children. And I can always find you right in my heart! I am sure my "siblings" feel the same. :) thank you for being proud of me! And thank you for being a wonderful example of how important and wonderful staying in touch with your soul is. I don't have many people I know in this life who really honor and nurture the Spirit as you do. When we met (in this life) I was at a point where I really needed to learn to take care of my WHOLE self and I know you helped me do that.
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